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i'm the independent woman

in becoming though..
2:39 AM
Monday, September 22, 2014


Alhamdulillah, finally i manage to go and watch the theater!!! *even i went there alone and watch it alone -.- my bro always janji keling -.- end up, i went there on my own jeaa :)

I was expected that this theater would be an "enthusiastic theater", it is enthusiastic though, but i never expect that the story line would make me CRY :'( about 4 times kot i cry in the theater, kindda embarrassing la if i went there with "him" or my other friends or even my bro -.- almost every part whenever Tengku Zarina confess the real struggle that she dealt with throughout her life with and without Mokhtar Dahari, i cry :"( during the first half of the theater pun i already cry ?? ish3, fefeeling benau en?? :)

To the music director of Supermokh, great jobbbb man :) love all the music and the songs made by Adlin Aman Ramlie, Hans Isaac and many more ;)

Actually half of the story behind Supermokh, I've already knew them all along since there's "a particular person" who always used to tell me a "bedtime story" about Mokhtar Dahari (in and out) before i go to sleep, or i shall say i fell asleep ;) How I really miss those bedtime stories that we used to had :') 

BUT!! Don't misunderstand it okayy~ I intended to go to Istana Budaya and watch any theater there since I was child lg laa~ I used to confess it to that "particular person" before this, and all of sudden he told me about this Supermokh The Musical. I was so excited as it is what I'm really into it. Music has been part of my life before, but then I stopped for (no reasons actually..) :( 

Last November (2013), I was being invited to be here by that "particular person". That person knows that how ENTHUSIASTIC I'M when it comes to MUSIC..... But apakan daya, tak da jodoh..... I didn't manage to go and be there by that time due to several obstacles happened unfortunately :'( 

But, that "particular person" managed to bring "someone" else to watch it this year.... truth sad, I thought "that particular" would like to bring me here due to my PASSION, but actually it is his "passion"... okay stop..... Lets go back to Supermokh :D

Hmmm, okay as usual, I'm being forever alone as ever -.- for today's show, I went to watch Supermokh aloneeeee :'( since last month dah janji dgn abg nk pg tgok teater Supermokh since Supermokh is restaging :(

7:14 PM
i was hurt, i'm still hurting..
Friday, September 19, 2014
Don't you feel sorry for her at least??

Don't you ever feel sad when you have someone you love but that particular person is falling in love with your friend??

Don't you ever feel guilty to have a feeling for your loved one's friend??

Don't you ever feel sorry for the one who struggled to open her heart just for you because you really want it to be happen at the first place??

Don't you ever feel regret of giving so many promises to her while you can't even manage to fulfil them??

Don't you ever feel guilty of keeping on convincing her that she's the one for you, she deserves to be with you, she will never be hurt anymore if she with you, she will be happier with you??

 Don't you ever feel sorry to her because you've promised that no matter what happens, you'll still fulfil the promise because as you have claimed that you won't promise if you can't make it happen??

Don't you ever feel guilty for telling everyone that SHE LEAVES YOU while you asked her to move on even though you yourself know that she still in love with you??

Don't you ever feel regret of telling to everyone that you are HEARTBROKEN because you've been hurt by her leaving while you yourself know that she endured HEARTBROKEN ever since she with you and even until now??

Don't you ever feel sorry because you have cut her from your life and heart while she still keep on fight for your love??

Don't you ever feel guilty because you didn't see those efforts she have been trying to put because all you ever see was her friend??

Maybe there was a misunderstanding, but why you choose to be apart from each other while you have time and space to settle it down first??

11:30 PM
Truth? or Lies??
Saturday, September 6, 2014
Truth may hurt you, but it doesn't kill.... Lies may please, but they don't heal....

Thanks for being honest to me, even though it might be a bit late...Dear friend, I'm so sorry to say this, but I'm hurt by you, really hurt, truth hurt..all these while we shared almost everything, from tears to happiness, even though within a numbered of days, yet it seems like you were leaded to me for being my soulmate because we shared almost the same common things.

Dear friend, why you do this to me?? What have I done to you?? Do you think I'm faking our friendship?? If you do, then please don't ever assume me like that anymore, because the truth is yea I know before this, once I had a bad assumption on you, but then I regret, so I confessed and being honest to you and ask for your apologise then. But seems like I'm the only one who always being honest here. This is heartbreaking though....

But whatever happens, as I have promised to you, I'll still be your friend and care for you as ever.
Dear friend, I know you're the best for him, but after all of what you has tell me, it seems like he can't be the best for you, but I still hope that he will change in times and be good to you...

Dear friend, I know how do you feel, I exactly know because I was in the same place as yours right now before, it hurts me to see you've been crying and hurt by him, but at the same time, I'm hurting here as well, much hurt than you because I've been hurt for so long, even until now......

Dear friend.....keep on fighting girl, don't cry, i'm hurt too..

7:29 PM
ever since 2009 until 2013
Wednesday, August 27, 2014
from 2009 until 2012, i manage to publish so many writings through this blog.

end up, i stopped.

but now, i'm coming back, because blog knows me a lot, blog has been with me from the past 6 years.
but i have to delete all of the old posts....

I will write again, and publish a lot more writings....


11:33 AM
Tazkirah for today
Friday, July 26, 2013
 Tuliskan setiap kesakitan itu pada pasir , dan pahatkan setiap kebaikan itu pada batu
Anyone pernah dgr tak ayat ni? Actually D pn bru jea dgr and tahu psal ni, that's why i wanna share it with you guys :) FYI, this is actually arab punya peribahasa :) 
maksud disebalik peribahasa ni ialah ; kalau orangg buat hati kita sakit or terluka, sharusnya kita cuba cepat memaafkan or lupakan dia, mcm pasir laaa, cepat berubah, elok2 ada lekuk2 kaki org yg lalu lalang kt tpi pantai, skejap ja pasir tu jd rata blik sbb air laut dah membasahinya. And kalau orang buat baik kat kita, kita harus selalu ingat and hargai mcm benda yg kita pahat kat batu, susah nak padam... 
actually, ada suatu kisah pda zaman dlu, ada 2 org sahabat yg bernama A and B. Suatu hari tu si A ni tampar si B, *comfirm ah sakit en, kna tampar kot -.-, pastu si B ni bengang + mrajuk2 sweet gituu, hahaha *dgn kawan haruslah sweet :P and si B ni tulislah "aku kena tampar dgn si A, bengkek plak hati kitee..." hahaha tak2 actually mcm gini "sahabatku, A telak menamparku.." then, ada suatu hari ni plak, si B ni terjatuh and lemas dlm sungai, so suddenly si A selamatkan dia, starting from that moment si B pahatkan kt batu "hari ni sahabatku, B selamatkan aku.." 
so nampak tak permainan dia kt sini? walau sesakit mana pn seseorang tu pernah sakitkan hati kita, kita harus memaafkan dia tambah pula sesama islam :) sbb kita tk tahu qada dn qadar Allah kan? kot2 la nnti org yg sakitkan hati kita tu juga la akan tolong kita suatu hari nnti, MashaAllah :)

this is who i am


Hey, it's me Dayang Shuhaida. But they just call me D
Everyone in life is gonna hurt you, you just have to figure out which people are worth the pain.
When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile.
Allah SWT is the reason why even in pain, you smile; in confusion, you understand; in betrayal, you trust; and in fear, you continue to fight.
Nothing can change your destiny except dua to Allah.
I seek for Allah bless when day comes and I believe in Allah guidance when night comes.
Sky is always changing its color. Just like the sky, human need to change.
As muslim, we have to keep moving on, upgrading our mind, to reach our dream.
Remember, Allah doesn’t like those who only keep his seat every time.

To give a trust to someone complete stanger, does you think that its an easy thing??

Your difficulty to give the trust is the strong protect for you from being fooled or being hurt

So that makes me a heartless woman when it comes to a relationship ;)

its the great escape

communicate with me